M is for Motor Cars

April 16, 2016 4:19am Published by Jules Smith in Whimsy On A Wednesday 16 Comments


Now I like a nice motor, ya know? My choice would be an Aston Martin were I rich enough and since I’ve been residing in the good old US of A I’ve looked at which car I’d choose to drive if I stayed here. I came to the conclusion that I’d need two. Naturally. One for dossing about all day that I could chuck stuff in and drive out to the wilderness with shooting equipment (cameras) and picnics and paint and cookies. Then I’d need a girl about town thing that looked like a bitch. So, this is what I’d have:

1: A big, dirty, mean looking pick up. A Silverado 3500 HD. That’ll do me just fine.

2: Mustang Shelby GT350R. If I can’t have that then I’d accept a Dodge Charger Hellcat or a Chevrolet Camaro.

I’m totally moving to America. I even said totally which means I’m picking up the lingo. Just let me go eat a plum, can’t have that.

But then….my friend took me to The Car Art Festival.

“The what?” I asked.

“You’ll like it,” she said.

Well she wasn’t wrong there! BONKERS! I might’ve changed my mind on the above.

At this fabulous, downtown event people lined the streets to see how artsy folks have decorated their cars. Take a look:

IMG_0977 IMG_0976 IMG_0975 IMG_0974 IMG_0978 IMG_0979 IMG_0980 IMG_0981 IMG_0982 IMG_0983

The above has joker appeal…

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Looked out the back window when going home and noticed a giant tarantula following me.  If you read my bio, you will note that I’m not a fan of spiders. Talking of pets…


On a totally separate note I have some pets. Lizards. They come and visit me on the patio and I’ve named them all. There’s Basil, Green, Blick, Stripe and Panic. I also have two birds that look like posh pigeons / brown doves. I’ve called them Peter and Paul. They come and drink at the bird bath and look at me. None of these creatures are scared of me and that makes me feel a bit like Snow White. However, I suddenly worried that Peter and Paul might fancy eating my lizards so now when they’re all outside together I have to go too and keep a watchful eye. I already have pet stress.

And since then…The guitarist from the 60’s group, The Turtles ( and now TheBone Sharks) in LA has recorded my song “Lone Star” from yesterdays post.  And I feel so flippin’ honoured I can’t tell you ~Listen here.



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That tarantula…Totally!

How bonkers is that eh, Anthony? I don’t know how that scooter stays up! 🙂

Wow, look at you: author, lyricist, photographer, philanthropist (probably).

Some of those cars are just marvellous… but they wouldn’t last five minutes in my local Sainsbury’s car park.

You after a loan, Masher? I guess you’re a good cause, making me laugh with that good ‘ol British humour. I nearly put a pic on here for you today – “M is for manhole cover pic for Masher!” Yes, i’ve taken one. I’m sure I’ll slot it in somewhere – I know how much you like ’em.

Yeah that wouldn’t go down well in Sainsbury’s would it!

If you move to the US, your license points will reduce to 0, sort of a driving reset. However, if you buy a motorcycle and drive down the street looking like a huge spider, the police might take notice…even in Houston.

Ooh well that’s flippin tempting, Larry!

Not gonna get a spider unless its a McLaren ;P

M should have been for Motorcycle…and come to think of it, D could have been for Ducati, but it’s your blog.

Oh, how remiss of me on her birthday and all! It’s clearly subliminal jealousy. I thought I was better than that.

Maybe I can do S for She-Devil…

M is also for Mowgli and Midnight Moonshine (Burgers).

all of these cars are secretly living, breathing Transformers. robots in disguise. cos of the Allspark. except for the spider one, that’s Croissants’s. she had to come back home to live with her parents after her gentle giant left her for a gumdrop. that’s a lyric in the making.

love this song! love your poetry, mah dahlin. love his gravelly voice. now all you need is an ethereal Margo Price cover with the wood and mushrooms and stuff *)

And she followed me like a spider, on a dusty street
chasin’ after me until we could meet
With her hot buttered fingers
she made me weary
and sometimes teary
but her love for me always lingers
I tried to corner
I tried to mourn her
I even tried to run her over
but the woman got me like a curse…

Bring me Margo and her nose *)

Okay, love the moss and grass-mobile! Almost made me choke on my coffee. The peacock one came in a close second.

I think you and I could knock a good one up! Challenge ? 🙂

Ooo yes! Crazy ideas are dancing in my head already. Maybe shaped to look like a bull with big horns in front and the seats have to be on top, saddle shaped of course…don’t forget the hydraulic kit for that bucking action. You could even wear your boots and I’ll get some spurs. Don’t ask me to wear chaps though. A girl has to draw the line somewhere…though for the paltry sum of a margarita or five, I won’t know what the hell I’m doing anymore. Just please make sure they sparkle. Yep, I’m nuts. When it comes to challenges, the wilder the better.

I LOVE it! Rodeo, cowgirl style. It’s got winner written all over it! Just need to nick a jalopy and get to work! 🙂

I just love Lone Star of Texas. Country charts here we come!

Thank you Rick 🙂 I think I need to got to Nashville and have a chat with some folks about my lyrical sorrow. On the travel list!

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