October the Twenty-Ninth is Dark

October 29, 2015 9:25am Published by Jules Smith in The Art Philosopher 11 Comments

October Dark and light: Inspired by the ‘two sentence’ horror stories I have decided to embark on a similar theme but mixing it up with one day of dark and menacing suggestion and the next of light and cheerful. Monday – Friday snippets from your Art Philosopher until All Hallows’ Eve is over…

October 29 new

 

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What about the husband?! What’s his comeuppance?!

Well I think she should revert back to October the Ninth for that one. :)http://julessmith.co.uk/october-the-ninth-is-dark/

Agreed. NOT his fault. He was clearly “looking for love in all the wrong places.”

Women need to place the blame on “the other woman” and not on the men for dalliances. After all, men are simple creatures and need NOT be held accountable for succumbing to the wiles of the “Female of the Species” (more deadly than the male).

I find this post optimistic…

So why is October 29 dark?

Well of course, you have to think like a woman in this scenario. First step is to annihilate the competition and then secondly find ways of dealing with him – poor, easily led fool. And if he is so susceptible to the femme fatale then it won’t be hard to side swipe him with vengeance.

Ok Larry, a question: If the female should always take the blame, then if your woman were to be playing about would that be her fault or would it be the fault of the other man?

Hmm.. it’s difficult to apply the same rules to oneself, isn’t it. That’s how I tend to think, anyway. Rules only apply to other factions and certainly not to divergents. 😉

Naturally it would be her fault.

I would deal with ‘the other man’ simply because I did not like him and he can live without testicles and a penis and become a celebrated “woman of the year” if he plays his cards right – reality show, clothing line, the whole thing. I might be doing him a favor.

The question for you is whether or not he would owe me royalties?

The royalties for playing with your valued asset or for making him a celebrity freak?
Either way, I think you should get at least a third.;)

That’s how I see it. I’ll take 30% for the surgery, no money up front, just a back-end deal. His agent can take 10%, his manager another 10%, his lawyer will want 20% and he can keep 30% to spend any way that he wants to. That sounds fair to me.

I’m more intrigued by the photo that accompanies this post.

WTF is it?

It’s the deep, dark and tempting hole of sin, Masher. And with this one there’s freedom at the end..if you can just break through this time. This one has the chance of being the ultimate prize so the temptation is so much greater.

And it is also part of my WTF? range which means I can’t tell you anything. Except that it might be part of some underground tunnel system in a very old church.

Gordon Ramsay enters the study. there’s strangely a lead pipe and a wrench in plain sight in the middle of the room even though the Mansion’s plumbing is fine.

young woman: i’m sorry, milady, i know it was wrong, but he hooked me with his mac ‘n cheese.

Benedict Cumberbatch enters the study.

wife: wait, your husband is Benedict Cumberbatch?

young woman: *nods*

wife: oh. y’know, maybe we can work out an arrangement.

the two women follow each other into the lounge, 15 spaces *)

And 15 slices of burnt toast laying on the coffee table.

ALL OF A SUDDEN AND STRAIGHT AWAY A LOUD AND PIERCING CACKLE COULD BE HEARD.

Wife: What the…?

Croissants: You think I’d let that young slip of a thing get a lifetime with Benedict Cumberbatch? He’s mine!

Young woman: But…he’s my husband.

Wife: And we had a deal.

Suarez: Bite me.

Wife: I’m really not that desperate.

Suarez: I was talking to her (young woman) wanna practise penalty shoot outs? Me first.

Young woman: Help me.

Wife: You made your own bed , misses.

Gordon: Mac ‘n’ Cheese?

*)

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