verbal art

The Art Philosopher

Posted on: 30th Jul, 2010

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Gardening class – 3 places left for sat – Anyone interested? Kt x.  By the way Kt your name has 5 letters in it. x
Don’t be stupid – AS IF!! Why would anyone want to go to a gardening class?  Get a life and get someone else to do your gardening.  Ok some people like gardening – I like gardens but enjoying pulling out weeds that come back twice as high the very next week ? No thanks.  Bad news.   Go out and eat cake – have 2 if you want.  I prefer a cream slice as you get several layers of pastry, cream, jam and icing. YUM  Fancy a cupcake? Me too. Lemon one’s from Costa. What am I doing? Who knows.  Even I don’t. I never know where I’m going to end up in life.  I sometimes wonder how I fit into this world. Don’t bother me unless I look interested in you.  Call me names and suffer the consequences – If you have a problem with me solve it or we can solve it together!. I don’t do rude waiters / service staff.  If I’m nice to you then be nice back, don’t take it out on me – if you don’t like your job then LEAVE.  Don’t teach kids unless you LIKE them.  Don’t change plans, I don’t like it.  I may be getting excited about it and then you’ve gone and mucked it up.  Don’t call yourself a friend when all you do is brag about yourself and yours and care nothing for anyone else- go away and don’t waste my time.  I like spewing it all out- get it out on the page then go back home and have a slice of toast.  If you are going to go and butter my toast then make sure you go right to the edges, I HATE toast that’s just buttered in the middle.  Use face cream daily, there’s nothing worse than dry skin. Your skin should be looked after beautifully. Dry hands are bad too, I can’t bear to touch anything if my hands are dry. I heard the other day that we are imprisoned in our skin like solitary confinement for life.  Disturbing but true.  I’m very afraid of everything and then sometimes I’m scared of nothing – that’s the time that you need to be scared of me!  I get worried by TV dramas like criminal minds and convince myself that passing strangers are serial killers – “Did you see the way he looked at me?”  I am also scared of spiders, especially the large designer looking ones.  I don’t like the way they zip across the room in angular defiance.  Apparently conkers keep them out of your house – I don’t know if it’s true but I do it anyway, I just have to stop the dog from eating them. Talking of which I am now going to walk my dogs and breathe in the tapestry of the countryside.
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