Where’s My Thing?

The Art Philosopher

Posted on: 28th Oct, 2013

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I’m sitting at my Mac having to write a list of random questions for company employees so I can write little bio’s on them and their personalities.  It’s interesting to see what people come back with as I’ve always considered myself a natural mentalist/ profiler.  I really should work for MI5, I can’t believe they have never poached me.

When I ask all these work based and personal questions, it always makes me think about my own answers. That kind of scares me. It’s very difficult to profile yourself and come up with anything positive.  I’m more inclined to consider packing my suitcase and checking in to the ‘personality disorder’ clinic.

I am constantly trying to find a way to set the world on fire and failing.  Where’s my genius? What’s the ‘thing’ inside me that has yet to be discovered and will I ever find it?  Do we all even have a certain something that is going to make a difference? Should I try EVERYTHING in order to locate it?  Maybe I should practise my soprano in the shower or I should have just bought a cello to see if I had the ability to create haunting sounds like no other.  I guess I will die trying, at least. I can’t seem to settle for mediocre.  In anything.  It’s too stultifying.

  When I’m a grey haired old lady, sitting in my rocking chair, sucking on pork chops and trifle, I want to look back at my life and think, “ Shit lady, you rocked this world.  You gave it your best shot and the results were INSPIRING!”

So why is this not happening?

Well, this leads me nicely to one of the questions on my list that I’ve been considering in the back of my monkey brain for most of the morning:

If you could give your younger self any advice what would you say? 

Here’s what I’d say to myself: 

Sit down smarty pants, me and thee are gonna have a bit of a chat.  Here, have a bacon sarnie and by the way, don’t listen to anyone that says bacon is fattening or leggings are flattering. Trust me on this one.

Pay attention, keep still and listen to this rip – roaring advice. For starters, giving something your all for 24 hours isn’t really long enough.   You can’t expect people to buy into you and what you do if you’re not prepared to keep on pushing.  You really can’t think “Oh fuck it” and move onto the next thing just because nobody else has instantly got it! Try and make a whole 8 hours a day doing ONE thing rather than flitting to several others.  Show some grit girl!
Though I would discourage the use of any addictive substances I think drugs may be an option for this element of your personality.

Stop listening to negative people.  LOSE them. Or hit them.  Whatever works. 

Find the things that make you happy and fill you with joy and stick to them.  The rest is just background noise.  Happiness, laughter and love are KEY.

Never lose your passion.  

Be confident in whatever you do no matter who tries to scupper it or demean it. The future you is remarkably confident when drunk – maybe answers really do lie in the bottom of a wine bottle…it’s worth exploring. 

Don’t let anyone else define you. You will read lots of meaningful, inspiring quotes like this in your lifetime and then forget them. I suggest you learn them off by heart.  You might make it to Dalai status. 

Now get out there and give it some dinner!

(Not holding my breath.) 

Now logic would suggest that surely I can still apply this piece of advice to my current self and get it together, right? 

Hmmm…

And would my younger self have listened?  

No.

 Seems I must continue in the search for my ever elusive genius. The cunning little escapist. 

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41 Comments on Where’s My Thing?

Bathwater

Bathwater

28th Oct, 2013 15:10

Really? I just tell myself not to marry that bitch… it will be the worst mistake of your life, oh and invest in Apple, Pixar, Mircosoft, Netflex and Google.

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Juliette

Juliette

29th Oct, 2013 17:10

And this, Bathwater, is why I’m not a bloody genius….why didn’t I think of that?

On a side note – can you send me that link again please as it has ceased to be valid.

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David Oliver

David Oliver

28th Oct, 2013 16:10

I watched Zero Dark Thirty **spoiler, sort of**

A young woman joined the CIA, I believe right out of college. Her one goal was to find Bin Laden. It took 12 years. She found him! I think the lesson in this is to decide on a goal and stick to it.

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Juliette

Juliette

29th Oct, 2013 17:10

yes but…TWELVE YEARS… God…I’m lucky to manage twelve sodding minutes. You are, however, quite correct. Now the pain of picking a goal.

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Red

Red Shoes

15th Nov, 2013 12:11

I thought that said, ‘picking a goat’…

No, that isn’t the pain… the pain is going to be sticking with that goal, once you determine what that goal is!

~shoes~

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Juliette

Juliette

15th Nov, 2013 16:11

HAR!!

Yes, Shoes. That is the pain. stickability, resolve and tenacity. Now, where do I find those?

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Exile on Pain Street

Exile on Pain Street

29th Oct, 2013 10:10

Mystery achievement.
Where’s my sandy beach?
I’ve got my dreams like everybody else
but they’re out of reach.

If you don’t give yourself an occasional pep talk, then who will? Careful about the bottom of the bottle. It’s a nice place to visit but you wouldn’t want to live there.

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Juliette

Juliette

29th Oct, 2013 17:10

Mystery achievement. I know thee well. The Pretenders! (Yes I looked it up) Next step “Got brass, in pocket” hmmm..
I only visit it now and then as it gives me such incredible ideas and confidence I feel that my genius could POP any minute. Then I forget the next day and have to nurse my head, my aching guts and the reality seems so much darker.

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Dee

Dee

29th Oct, 2013 15:10

I love this so much, I shared it on twitter! Other girls loved it too!

And yes, your younger self would definitely NOT have listened. Teenagers are so stubborn.

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Juliette

Juliette

29th Oct, 2013 17:10

That’s proper nice of you Dee 🙂 Thank you. I’ve been twittered. How tweet.
Nope. I most definitely wouldn’t have listened. I would have rolled my eyes and thought “who’s this freak?” I never listened to anyone. Still don’t. There’s a lesson there somewhere..

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the late phoenix

the late phoenix

29th Oct, 2013 15:10

IN VINO VERITAS

last night, for the first time in 5 years, i had pork chops for dinner, pork chops with lemon. they were f****** good! wait, that’s it! that’s the key: pork chops! like…good things come to those who wait…something? i dunno, i guess the lesson in all of this is…just that pork chops are f****** good.

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Juliette

Juliette

29th Oct, 2013 18:10

In wine there is truth! I fully agree. Do you know what, I’ve not had a good pork chop for a very long time. I lean more toward the BACON when it comes to swine food. I must get back on that f******* band wagon!

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Gorilla Bananas

Gorilla Bananas

29th Oct, 2013 16:10

Well, Jules, maybe you’ve already got a lot of things. I would like to see you dance to salsa music, because I just know it has to be your thing. One of your things, I mean.

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Juliette

Juliette

29th Oct, 2013 18:10

🙂 Mr GB you are a wise soul. Why I can shake it Shakira style and more! I can make twerking BORING. How have I not realised that this was the way forward…and back…and spin…and double spin… and cross body lead… excuse me… must shimmy off…

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Azra

Azra

29th Oct, 2013 18:10

Ms Jellybobble… are you sure we aren’t related? It’s like you speak my language…

Finding my “thing” —> this right here is the crux of my existential crisis. Some days I feel like everyone knows something, some secret to life, and I’m the only one in the dark. *sigh*

I would tell my younger self not to have such high expectations and to relax… and most important of all, to be consistent and steadfast in everything I do 🙂

Love You Jules xxx

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Juliette

Juliette

30th Oct, 2013 10:10

Azra… my long long sister 🙂 Of course we are..somehow.
I know what you mean. How come everybody seems to be happy -go- lucky and ok with their lot? What IS this secret we don’t know about? Or maybe you’re right; it’s our high expectations.:)
Love you more xxx

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Crystal Collier

Crystal Collier

30th Oct, 2013 15:10

Awesome. Such excellent advice. I hope your younger self would listen, but if she didn’t, it would probably be because you’re pretty awesome with where you are. I think it’s difficult to see the impression we’ve left on our small corner of the world.

Still, you talk about things you can do going forward, and I just keep thinking of my littles. I can be the best darn mom I know how and contribute to a brighter future, not just for myself, but for everyone my kids will ever touch. One of the best pieces of advice I’ve ever heard is, “The perfect place to begin is exactly where you are right now.”

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Juliette

Juliette

30th Oct, 2013 21:10

Thanks for the vote of confidence Crystal 🙂 x
I know you are a great Mum, you can tell the top dollar Mummy’s! That is a wonderful piece of advice and I shall begin right now. 🙂

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LL

LL

31st Oct, 2013 16:10

Do you want MI-5 to approach you? I do have friends.

What would I tell my younger self? —- —- —- Don’t do anything differently.

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Juliette

Juliette

31st Oct, 2013 18:10

YES!! Ha! Tell them I’m a natural and will be happy with a mere 7 figure salary!

Good advice L 🙂

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LL

LL

31st Oct, 2013 23:10

The Brits are hopelessly CHEAP. I hate to break the news this way on a blog.

But wait, there is still hope! I have long suspected that you were born a member of the Royal Family and switched at birth anyway, so perhaps if you claimed your ‘birthright’, you’d end up with free bangers and mash for life? You could write your book and end up on the talk show circuit. From blogger to Dutchess. It would make good copy. You could go to Las Vegas, drink too many Singapore Slings, get naked in public, pick up a beefcake Hollywood star and get scandalized — before you release the book. (Look at it this way, it would be fun and would sell more books)

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Juliette

Juliette

5th Nov, 2013 11:11

We are aren’t we. It’s because we are SO oppressed.:)
This explains why my blood is purple when it’s taken from me. I knew it. I think you should be a life coach LL, this is excellent advice. I can do this.

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LL

LL

8th Nov, 2013 13:11

OR in the alternative you could sign on to the plot that I’m hatching with Azra on her blog to simply bug out and hang on the beach on a tropical island. Beachcombing, eating pineapple, bananas (and drinking too many Singapore Slings) while you watch the sun rise from and set into the blue, temperate ocean…

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Juliette

Juliette

15th Nov, 2013 16:11

I’m there! That spells WIN to me!

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Masher

Masher

1st Nov, 2013 06:11

Patience and determination are key to you finding your thing.

It took me a long time to find my own thing, but with perseverance and an open mind, I did eventually find it.

It had fallen down the back of the sofa.

I also found a pen, some peanuts and 50p.

Result!

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Juliette

Juliette

5th Nov, 2013 11:11

I found a dodgy looking galaxy minstrel down there…is that it? 🙂

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Dean

Dean

1st Nov, 2013 18:11

When I came up with that phrase (when having long talks with myself) I never thought it would be so difficult to define the particular thing or things I was good at. A portion of the problem is certainly that we self-sabotage our genius; we are always the worst critic, the least satisfied customer of our vision and output. Why is that? Is it that we are simply to critical of creativity? Are we laboring without adequate reference points to compare our productivity? Maybe it is in the nature of the artist to be destructive. Whatever the cause, we should cut ourselves a sprout and accept that we all have a genius for something.

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Juliette

Juliette

5th Nov, 2013 11:11

You have long talks with yourself Dean? But..do you answer yourself? Because THIS is the sign of true madness. I’m in that gang, it’s pretty cool.
Yes, self sabotage…sigh.. I am most excellent at this thing. Maybe thats it! Self sabotage is my thing! Way to go…

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David Macaulay

David Macaulay

2nd Nov, 2013 01:11

This is sobering and thought provoking to read Juliette – mainly because I have come to the alarming conclusion you are me in disguise – sorta

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Juliette

Juliette

5th Nov, 2013 11:11

Well what can I say… EXCEPT YOU MUST BE EPIC. How’re ya doin’, kindred 😛

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Mina Lobo

Mina Lobo

3rd Nov, 2013 19:11

That’s excellent advice about the leggings, girl. Had to Tweet that one to the world.

I think the advice I’d give my younger self is: Yes, do things are they’re done, pay your dues, but don’t lose too much time waiting for others to validate you – in other words, if folks aren’t supporting your genius, strike out on your own.

As to *finding* one’s genius: well, I follow that which strongly draws me (which is a short list of stuff). (Possibly because I’m lazy.) (Yeah, probably that.) If you’re not sure what this is, I reckon you’ve gotta dabble and mess around and whatnot. Do one of them career/personality assessment whatses.
Check Out Mina’s Resurrection Blogfest II!

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Juliette

Juliette

5th Nov, 2013 11:11

Thank you Mina! I’m all twittery about this. Yeah.. I’m right on the leggings. Biggest fashion faux pas EVER apart from crocs and nylon bodywarmers. For the love of God.
I did one of those things in the past and I either get “You are not suitable for any profession” or something totally against my nature. I think I’ll go with your “Mess around and whatnot” seems that works for me ;P

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Mina

Mina Lobo

17th Nov, 2013 02:11

Try another one of them things, then.. When I do them, they always point me to writing and music. Or nursing. (Blerch.) Or counseling – which I would do if I didn’t fall to pieces the moment I see a person crying. 😀

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Red Shoes

Red Shoes

15th Nov, 2013 12:11

“If you could give your younger self any advice what would you say?”

I was honored and was fortunate enough to have received the ‘Outstanding Professor of the Year’ award at the institution where I am employed. The down side to this distinction is that I had the give the commencement address at the next graduation ceremony.

I fretted and worried so over what message I would give the new graduates. Since the world was in almost the same exact place where it was when I graduated college, this was the theme of my talk…and I think it was well received.

EVERYTHING you said above it SO on target!!!!

Now, go out there and do it, Ms Jules!!!!

~shoes~

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Juliette

Juliette

15th Nov, 2013 16:11

Shoes…Since you received ‘Outstanding Professor of the Year’ award I’m going to listen to every goddam thing you say from this point onwards 🙂

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Just a Dog Walker

Just a Dog Walker

17th Nov, 2013 14:11

Hello from your 100th follower (do I get a prize for that?). I would have told myself not to start smoking I think. Loved this post and looking forward to reading more

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Juliette

Juliette

20th Nov, 2013 15:11

Well hello ‘Just A Dog Walker’ – my new, special 100th follower! Yes, I think that definitely warrants a prize. So what do you want ? A packet of pickled onion monster munch or a bowl of trifle? 🙂

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goatman

goatman

20th Nov, 2013 23:11

My advice to myself would be to plant a tree in the yard so’s I could walk out and see if I did it.

Yea, Yea there it is . . . I did did it!
A bald cypress, , , name’s “Mike”.

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Juliette

Juliette

9th Dec, 2013 10:12

HA! I like that goatman 🙂

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The Blue Grumpster

The Blue Grumpster

27th Nov, 2013 02:11

Just stopping by to say hi. I wish I could read your posts, Jules. 🙁 Soon, right?

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Juliette

Juliette

9th Dec, 2013 10:12

Yes Randy, soon 🙂 sending you tons and tons of get better vibes. You are missed by us all x

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