Hello. I have nothing to say this week.
That’s not strictly true. I have plenty to say, it’s just that none of it is in words. It’s in layers of botanical printing, paint, pencil and charcoal, spread across every flat surface in the house, including at least one surface that was supposed to be the dinner table, I’m sure of it. This is what happens when your studio is full of the pubs A boards.
I’m up to my neck in art projects. Possibly up to my eyebrows. I can’t see my eyebrows, so I can’t confirm. They used to look devastatingly arched but I think my frown has eaten them.
So instead of a proper blog, you’re getting clowns and sinister pictures.
I’ve been sketching and printing clowns during my breaks. One of them is lovely.
The rest are what I’d describe as “dodgy”, in the same way service station sandwich is food. Picture Harley Quinn, but with a clown nose and a slightly unsettling look in her eye, like she knows where you parked. I’m sharing them anyway, because I’ve got nothing else to show you.
The next one is a work in progress. There hasn't been much progress because of the botanicals. I need an assistant. One called Bozo would be fun.
Speaking of clown noses, as you know, I own an emergency one. Everyone should. I keep it for social situations that need a little more discomfort. A long pause at a party? Clown nose. Someone asking what I actually do for a living? Clown nose. A meeting that should have been an email? Clown nose, and maintain eye contact. It works every time. Nobody knows what to do, and frankly, neither do I. This is when life becomes interesting. I like to think of it as social experimentation and psychological forward thinking. Lesser individuals call it weird. These people don’t understand mental growth.
Talking of growth…
Little Wild Things is still growing. That’s my collection of eight small original paintings, each one of one, each with a hidden line of writing tucked inside it like a note in a coat pocket. Five are out in the world now, and two of those have already sold, which means two lucky people have taste and the rest of you are dawdling.
The latest, Meadow Maids, is all inky daisies and lacy cowheads, with the line “Some things grow sideways” hidden in the work. Which is also my approach to life, deadlines, and parallel parking.
They’re £40 each, and once they’re gone, they’re gone. I’m not going to beg. I’m just going to leave this link here and look at you meaningfully, possibly while wearing a clown nose.
And finally, thank the Gourds
Last night pumpkins were carved and lit up outside the house, ready for Halloween. They look marvellous. Slightly menacing, but in a good way.
On Saturday, when the kids come a knocking, I’ll be opening the door with my two wolfits at my side and saying, “Meet Trick and Treat. Which one do you want to stroke?”
Normal service, and possibly actual content, will resume next Wednesday.
You need to dress up as an evil "Queen of the Dark Clown" for Halloween, and perhaps put some sort of hellhound costumes on the wolves (so they don't need to dress up). It also helps if eerie music emanates from Marmalade Cottage. Stephen King meets The Village. There is so much material here that it boggles the mind.